Gyrocopter-Made-of-Bits: Successful Accomplishment Complete

Our Gyrocopter / Bomber built of bits has successfully concluded. Base and Pilot are now present. Cost of parts was $16.87. Cost of shipping is not easy to calculate. These bits came along with assorted parts of Chaos and Undead of various sorts. The seller providing just about all these critters and bits, Bullet Bits, charges $0.20 per item beyond the first so we have $2.20 from what's there. The share of shipping for the rest would be another few dollars. A bit over $20, retail price $45 (free delivery if you spend another $20!).

Improper Use of Expensive Aerial Attack Airships

Now Hungry Ghosts rarely pays attention to the current comings and goings in the various armies of Warhammer 40K or Fantasy Battle. OK, he views them as crazy expensive sprues of juicy bits for conversions when they get broken down and tossed on eBay.

And the occasional writing in The Book of Grudges. Lamenting the utter destruction of Orky Kultcha, regardless of past enmity. We miss Khorne Stormboys. Mad Boyz were always good for a laugh, though snarrffulling bubbly beer may bring a few tears to the eyes.

We wuz orkses. We wuz fun.

 Groaning about the Beastmen turning from wild hordes of insane convolutions of animal, vegetable, mineral, and man to domesticated livestock with pointy sticks.  

Not all goats. Not at all.

 Mocking the grotesque proportions of the Dwarfs and Ratlings...

 ...and pointing out how on every element of monstrosity – spiky bits, giant guns, huge body parts - the Daemons of Chaos are outdone by Tyranid, Goblins, Dark Eldar, Necrons...

Daemon Prince, Tiny-legged, Wee-headed, Daemon Prince

But now things have gone too far. Coming suspiciously close to the revelation of the Legioss Moriad XIV Experimental Aeronautics Agency, Games Workshop has released a new WFB Dwarfs Army Book and several new models.

Amongst the Mighty Lords of Mighty Prices comes the new Dwarf Gyrocopbopter or whatever it's called when you don't want to say something is a helicopter, 'cause you can't trademark helicopter. Take a looksee: http://tinyurl.com/gyrocopbopper

So COMPLAINT THE FIRST: Notice that you can make a Gyrocopter or a Gyrobomber out of the set. If you go through the pictures and/or text ("The Gyrocopter is a small yet nimble war machine." and "Kept afloat by two rotor arrays and a dirigible balloon, the Gyrobomber is part Gyrocopter and part airship.")

You will see that the Gyrobomber is about twice as big as the Gyrocopter.

Once upon a time, there was a game company that would notice that the Bomber is about twice as big as the Copter. That company wouldn't just sell one set that leaves the Dwarf enthusiast with a relatively small Gyrocopter, a pile of bits, and eyes watering with tears for the same price as a big old Gyrobomber, not much bits left over, and happy happy joy joy about their monstrous flying dragon-killer.

That company would say, “Hey, let's sell a Gyrocopter and a Gyrobomber as two different sets with prices reflecting the differences in size and complexity.” Or maybe “Hey, let's make one big-ass boxed set that let's you make one big-ass Gyrobomber or two Gyrocopters, swift as dragonflies.”

Instead, you blow $45 on a model that uses half the stuff in the box. Merry Beermass, beardlings!

COMPLAINT THE SECOND: Gaze upon the text accompanying these amazing flying machines.

“Gyrocopters and Gyrobombers represent the best of Dwarf engineering. Designed by the Engineers Guild and inspired by combining dragon and drilling machine the original Gyrocopter design took centuries to gain acceptance.”

There seems to be some words or maybe punctuation left out of that blurb, but we get the essence: these machines are the best, and the best means expensive, the best means prestige, the best means Living Ancestors tell you before you board the craft: “take care of this fucker or we'll have your balls if you survive the crash-landing.” Right? Right.

But instead of this proper care and handling of an expensive experimental awesomeness that took totally a lot of time to get permission to create, we are told that these machines are:

“Piloted by beardlings (still growing into their whiskers!) these fearsome war machines are regularly seen bombing the battlefield with wanton abandon.”

Hungry Ghosts has no problem with using fearsome war machines, or bombing the battlefield with wanton abandon.

Hungry Ghosts does have a problem with experimental war machines and weaponry... a problem with making too many of them. The fact is that the Dark Mechs of the Legioss Moriad have a free pass to screw around with any manner of machine, be it meat or metal, or more likely both.

 Most recently, there's been uncontrollable urges to develop mobile weapon platforms that eliminate the need for a team of two to handle a heavy weapon. Like so:

Hungry Ghosts Mechs are busy melding these Necromunda Pit Slaves (Pit Slave 4 and 5, fresh from the Underhive!) with the type of weaponry normally seen mounted on wheels or tracks. In the interests of controlling the beasts and gathering lots of datas, our Pit Slaves have implanted computronic displays, info-jacks, and cybertubes.

These here Pit Slaves were purchased for use as the other three: vehicular violence victims.

But they are honking huge comparatively, and well armed... except for the arm cut off... or maybe now they're even more well armed … stupid pun confusion ….

"Don't press the Red Button" "Which one's the Red Button, he ain't painted yet?"

The Galaxy's Worst Cell Phone Contract Ever.

 The Dark Mechs of Moriad have a Dark Fascination with taming and controlling the ancient enemy of the Dwarf race, the dreaded Rust Monster. Here we see one such experiment, obviously going quite well.

Not only does our Rust Monster have twin-linked Las Cannons mounted upon its back, extra firepower has been pumped up by replacing the forelegs with Eldar Webspinners fresh from the exarch. All of this weaponry did require installing some additional brain power to the insect.* But care was taken to ensure the minimum was added, just a few little neuro-nubbins.

Back to the beardlings. Yes, beardlings like to get into all sorts of shenanigans. If your beardlings insist on flying, we know what to give them.

Put-Put Away Young Eagle, Put-Put through the Clouds in your little Cloud-Cars!

And of course they'll want to play with some dead bodies, or semi-dead bodies, try out some cyborgization or reanimation. So you let them play in here:

Not super expensive flying machines! Not even the pile of bits left over when you make the Gyrocopter instead of the Bomber!

Long rambling rant complete.

'Puters are hard when you come from a low-tech world

*Moriad Mechanicii have determined that the Rust Monster was possibly the first Tyranoid entity to penetrate the Great Bearded Galaxy**, long before the Catachan Devil or the Ambull.
**You didn't think we'd call it the Milky Way, did you?

Bits Bits Bits and the Skagerrak Skallen Fangsters Jet Pack Squadron

When we last saw the Legioss Moriad XIV experimental flight squadron, the Skagerrak Skallen Fangsters, it seemed that our evil little friends from Denmark just needed some weapons and right hands to be ready for (unpainted) action.

Well, Hungry Ghosts did that, and it took a very long time. This led to an investigation of why it took a very long time. Herewith, let us go and make our visit.

  There they are, my little Khornicons.

First, the insidious intent: Overkill. Weaponry that would never be considered acceptable in a 40K game by reasonable people.

 This led first to Chaos Squats Plastic Bits Box 1. Here, the guns bin in the upper right was plundered for all those new Space Marines Plasma Pistols, Inferno Pistols, Hand Flamers; whatever was explosive enough but not too ridiculous when being held in one hand while flying.

Then the long row of hand weapons was rummaged through for pointy hacking type things. Also, the Bolt Pistols from the weapons bins to use along with the pointy bits.

But with those hundreds bits, there could be no chance that our Flying Squats would go without decorative skulls or swanky spikes. Or that guns would go unmodified. So the rest of our plastic bits were inspected for potential use.

Then the Chaos Squats Plastic Bits Box 2.

 

This is where spikes, Tyranid bits, and stuff too big for the other box lives.

 Then came the Process of Exclusion.

Right off, we're not going to use

the Space Marines Storm Raven that has been accumulating from low bids on bits on ebay. 

That's about $5-6 there. 

And certainly not the

 

$6 Imperial Guard Valkyrie.

Patience pays off: remember, you're not going to use that whatever for who knows how long; quiet accumulation can be more rewarding than indulging in the "It's so cool, I want it now!" urge.

Not using the Imperial Tanks and Cities of Death parts. We have plans for those. And the extra Valkyrie Troops Compartment below as well.

Not going to need the Tau bits (including most of a cheap-ass Fire Warrior squad), the Chaos Chariot Gore Beast (ready to join the Bear-Master and Cyboar Cyclor), nor headless Cold Ones. 

Definitely not that Daemon Prince, who looks much more impressive when spread out against the floor like a patient dissected on a table, for planning purposes.

Where there is time yet for a hundred visions and revisions. How modest seem the actual Chaos pieces when compared with Tyranids, Dragons, and other foul beasts. How his legs are thin next to the Hive Tyrant and Zombie Dragon. That Terrorgheist has some very useful bits as well.
 

Now things get a bit tougher.

Do we want to use the Ork bits? Lots of tubes and spikes. But no, we'll save them for the Secret Land Train Secret Project, along with the Imperial Tanks. 

What a terrible name for a secret project.

Now this is really a tough choice: Dark Eldar and Necrons. So many possibilities. But too many possibilities. Since Hungry Ghosts has a second set of Ewal Dvergar to convert, they will use the Dark Eldar and Necron bits.

Cometh the Undead. Such very nice bits from those Vampire Counts monstrosities. Surprisingly cheap as well. Seems with all these new plastic kits, there's some sort of critter in the middle that possesses all the useful power. That critter might go for $15-25. But the rest? $1-3 for an entire side of ghostly horsemen or creepy skeletal enclosures. A person could build their own Mountains of Madness for not much money.

Also, flowing tides of magicks from Tzeentch Daemons. We'll use some wisps of magic and some new style skeletal cavalry bits. Them Hexwraiths are covered in ghostly flames.

If only for the sake of what few sanity points I still possess, by fiat none of the used bits will be used here. Not even the baggie with the skeletal horse parts.

Or the Assorted Space Marines Parts and the Whole WFB Critter Bodies and Scenery bits. No one needs a Gnoblar leg right now.

I said I was not going to look at the metal bits because that would take forever...

And it did.

It really did. They are so very nice.

But the Battlefleet Gothic parts, Nurgle Drone Riders, Big Plastic Guns, and Skeletal Horsemen will be included in the potential permutation pool of parts.
 

With the infernal sun rising, our evil little Skagerrak Skallen Fangsters are personalized.

 Those reddish-brown spots are, as Rorschach would say, human bean juice. 

 Sometimes, when handling small parts, there's no such thing as "cut away from yourself". As when dealing with the little arrow bits cut off of a Tzeentch Icon and attached to the face of our Chaos Squat on the left. And sometimes, the finger bleeds fast. Faster than the smelly liquid wound sealer can dry.

But Hungry Ghosts is very efficient. Here are the bits left over after everything was done. Mostly Space Marines, and they deserved it.

Now You Will Know Fear, O Emperor's lapdogs: We have the strength of technology and body to fire a Bolter with one hand!!!

Chaos Squats 40K Special Character Chikibi Chhattisgarh, Hungry Ghosts Gunnery Sergeant, Volume III: The Dragging-Outtening

Now we will finish having fun with Gunnery Sergeant Chikibi. Based on Catachan Imperial Guard Gunnery Sergeant Harker, Sgt Chikibi's main weapon is also a Heavy Bolter used without the need for a loader assistant.

Strapped to the lower right arm is the 'Terrordactyl', which is huge enough to have a mind of its own. Which is good, because Chikibi has 4 arms and a prehensile tail to think about. Also not spilling his pipe.

Terrordactyl is based on the Heavy Bolter that came with the Rogue Trader Space Dwarfs weapons sprue. It has been given life with eyes created from some inset gem bits from some creature that did not deserve such finery. Terrordactyl is part Tyranid like Chikibi. In this case, the claw comes from an Epic Lictor. The large spikes at the rear also come from the Tyranid Biomorphs sprue, with small spikes snipped off of the Dark Eldar Warriors that everyone was super-happy to get in the 40K 3rd Edition set.

The "rear leg" is a sword handle from a mid-1990s Orc Regiment sprue. Of course, the ribcage and spine are from the venerable Skeletal Horse. And I still have a baggie of Skeleton Army bits for the future.

The color of the body of the weapon comes from using a very old version of Bad Moon Yellow, right out of the Ork & Eldar Paint Set, that is translucent and good for nothing other than acting as a glaze over darker shades.

 

The last thing seen by enemies of the Hungry Ghosts.

Maybe this.

Assessing the possibilities...

Chaos Squats 40K Special Character Chikibi Chhattisgarh, Hungry Ghosts Gunnery Sergeant, Volume II: The Title-Lengthening

Back from a word from our sponsor, but still scatterbrained. When Hungry Ghosts was in college, wearing our sponsoring Pantera Cowboys from Hell shirt, he was friends with a professor who enjoyed discussing Greco-Roman architecture (cause that was his job) and one such discussion topics was the "Yeshua ben Pantera" theory. For those lacking in Semitic linguistics skills, that means "Jesus, son of Pantera". 
The "Jesus, son of Pantera" theme had been in religious studies since the 2nd Century AD, and 'twas for centuries dismissed as pagan lies.
 Then came the construction of the Bingerbrück Hauptbahnhof at (for the time) the boundary of the Großherzogtum Hessen and the Rheinprovinz of Preußen in the late 1850s. This turned up a Roman cemetery containing a burial marker with an inscription belonging to a Roman soldier bearing the name

Tiberius Iulius Abdes Pantera

From Sidon, a city well known in biblical days, including for its place in Jesus's preaching tour of the region. Who is said to have lived 62 years, with 40 years of service in the Imperial Legions. But little else is known. Hungry Ghosts is also watching Die Römer im Südwesten (Germany) right now. Which is where Bingerbrück is. One of those places that are important that you've never heard of, Bingerbrück was the target of at least 7 major bombing missions in WW2.

 

Before...

 

 After.

Bingerbrück is the link from the left-bank Rhine railway to the Nahe valley railway, should one desire to travel from Mainz to Metz. Which is perhaps a surprisingly popular thing to do, or to prevent others from doing. Even the Swedes attacked in 1632.

Now that we have mentally traveled from the southeast frontier to the northwest frontier of Imperial Rome, when we last saw Chikibi ... he had been spontaneously mutated into another character,
Marbo Machinder

"strength in purity" the dwarf with the necrotic arm disagrees

 

There he is, coming through the door...

 

Here we have the left shooty-side of Chikibi. He is wielding a Las Pistol from the old Rogue Trader Squat/Imperial Guard weapons sprues (yes, sometimes someone actually uses one of them). Of course Las Pistols mostly suck, so Chikibi's humanoid wrist is wrapped with grenades...

 

 ...all the way...

...around.

Now you're thinking "Hey, sure he's got four arms, but two of the three others have skull-crushing claws and the other has a gun so big it needs its own character sheet strapped to it. So what's he going to do with those grenades?"

If Chikibi is somehow reduced to relying on his grenades, he will use his Chaos Gift of Sheer Anger to ram that fist into whatever passes for a mouth of whatever put him in the state of Sheer Anger, always hits/no saves, and pops the pins with his Willpower.

He's been told the arm will grow back. It will grow back.

The weird shape of Chikibi's shoulder-region made finding the right bit of armor not a problem at all, because I used another piece from the Ancient Skeleton Army sprues.

Cavalry armor breastplate!

http://solegends.com/citcat19912/c20334plasticskelarmy-02.htm

Didn't even have to change the rotation from the sprue.

So our crunchy-crunchy claw-arm has a wide range of movement available through the waist ridge of the plate, while the las-grenade arm pokes out as intended by the Undead, the left arm side. Chikibi's head can rotate about thanks to the curved edge for the right arm, and his rounded sack full of sugarplums and children's dreams is accommodated by the neck section. A frame joined unto a fearful symmetry.

 

The symbol on the breastplate is a variant of one of the Hungry Ghosts symbols:

But even with the smallest tip pen, it still looks a bit crammed, and is nigh impossible to photograph well.

Here we have an older picture, before the addition of the symbol. It is not terribly satisfactory either, with its expanse of red. So what to do here...

More pictures: With The Grudge Master

 

 Catchin' Orks

 

 Combating the Other Green Menace,

well, mostly brown, in this case.

The Grudge Master fears no flame.

Winters afoot...